The Idealistic Notion of “Love at first sight”

I saw an article about the fact that some parents feel Disney is “ruining” their kids idea of what love is.  Apparently teaching them that there is such thing as happily ever after is a bad thing.  I couldn’t disagree more.  What’s wrong with believing that there is some one out there who I could be happy forever with?  I get it that the word “forever” is debatable.  I know that my “happily ever after” will only last for “as long as we both shall live;” but, that’s life. Unfortunately, there is no guarantee in life and I think as long as we (as humans) understand that, we’ll be fine.

In my humble opinion, the bigger issue is when people think that it is possible to fall in love at first sight?  I feel like you can’t love someone you don’t truly know.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m not at all saying that there isn’t such thing as a “connection” at first sight; I just wouldn’t call it “love.”

The word love itself suggests a certain level of intimacy- I feel like “loving” someone brings out the best in them and in you.  In order to accomplish that, there are certain things that you need to know:  What are his/her quirks? Intricacies?  Take me, for example, not many people would know that I hate clowns, or that I love Thanksgiving; how can any person “love” me (or I him) without knowing these things?  I know I’m stretching here when I say this, but how could I “love” someone who’s obsessed with clowns?  I hate clowns, they scare the day lights out of me.  So, even if I could live with them surrounding me, it certainly isn’t going to bring out the best in me if I’m constantly terrified.

Anyway, I could go on and on, but I won’t.   I just don’t think that loving someone whom you don’t really know is possible.  That’s not to say that there won’t be a connection, or even spark.  It’s just not love.  Love takes time.

Best,

Prof. D

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